Slowly, slowly I lifted my hand not wanting to disturb her. Suddenly I brought I brought my hand down “thwack” on my skin. Finally I killed the stupid mosquito that had been disturbing me since*tssswwww*. It was officially the 1st of December, 2018 and I was killing mosquitoes because I was in church. To be able to get to the engagement and wedding easily, I stayed at my aunt’s place. The whole family came for a vigil and instead of catching upon my beauty sleep I had to come with them.
At this time last year I was at the club (no I am not a bad girl). You see the 1st of December, 2017 is the day I launched my website. So after saying a quick prayer of thanks for 1 year of love, I tried to go back to sleep. After all, today would also mark the day I finally snagged myself a sugar daddy.
10am wedding day
I hadn’t gotten as much sleep as I would have liked but I was hyped. My able trusted friend and MUA @theglamfaery was at my place already(that girl is punctual for Africa). My mother had called me and I assured her that I would be there in time for the wedding. This time I was sure I would snag my fine bobo because I won’t sit with mummy. I had invited a friend along for the fun and also so that I can sit far away from my family people. The night before the devil tried to ruin my fine girl, my dress nearly messed up,my earrings sort of got lost and I realized I didn’t have shoes to wear. In my panic I called four different friends, lamenting how my villager wantu catch me. But las las my God is good!!!
Make up sesh started and I was shifting my bum bum on the seat as usual. If it was a Nigerian hairdresser I for don chop knock sef. My friend came after that and touched up her make up too. Next thing I know it’s a little past 11pm and I’m rushing to call a taxify. The wedding was supposed to start by 11 oo but me I just left Ketu for the Island at 11pm. I was just praying that we get there in time so that my mother will not shout at me in public and spoil all my fine girl.
Jamming in the Taxify
As fine girls always do when glammed up, we told the driver to turn up the stereo, and started taking pictures and making videos while trying to pose. You never can tell where your soul mate will find you oo. It can be inside taxify as he passes by in his Ferrari, abi? After doing that fora while and bobo no turn up we concluded that our guys are waiting for us at the wedding. It seemed like we were making progress o when we got into traffic. Eeeeh! It was already few minutes to 1pm.
Finally ooo, my haters have succeeded.Shay wedding wee not have finished like this? What if my bobo does not like party and is not at the engagement? Abi what of if they call him at work because he is the company Boss? He has to work now, you know for our money. God please oooo, just help me clear this hold–up so that I can meet the guy you have placed there for me.
After almost praying my make up off, we finally got to the wedding.Late but at least, we arrived looking fine like barbecued chicken, with a side of fries and ketchup. *grrrr* that was the sound of my stomach protesting the fact that I had not eaten. Sucking in my little belly pooch (I’m extremely proud of the pooch junk food gave me) I walked in with my friend (let’s call her Ife for the sake of this story). Getting In we realized they were almost done with the wedding and there were no seats at the back so we stood outside for a bit.“Babe, where are the fine boys oo. I have not seen any” Ife asked. Scanning the area I noticed the same thing “ahan I cannot see any, you saw the pic I sent you now. Don’t worry they will be at the reception.” My heart in my chest I began to pray that these guys should not disgrace me. How can all the fine boys just disappear like that?
As I was contemplating going to pray in one corner, the newly wed – extremely fine- couple walked out with both the bride and groom’s train behind them. As I sighted the first handsome bar of chocolate with full beards, my heart went back to its position. Turning my head to the side, I smiled at Ife and she smiled back. It was time to catch big fish.
Is the Reception in another state ni?
After taking a couple of pictures at the wedding with mummy and other family members, plus me changing my outfit we left to get to the reception. I and Ife walked outside to wait for our taxify ride (we need a gift from taxify for all this rides). While waiting that’s how one car like that zoomed near us and just stopped. Some evidently drunk guys in the car now started practicing their absolutely hopeless pick-up lines. Unfortunately for them, our ride arrived just at that moment and we were in the car and off sharp sharp.
The taxify guy now asked us if we know the venue. We said no and agreed he should use the Google map. All was fine, until we were still going after 20 minutes. Asking the driver, he told us to look at the map and we saw we still had 20minutes more. Still following the map, we passed by the sea for a while, then went through a road that was wavy. The driver, I and Ife just kept laughing all through the ride hoping we were not lost. As soon as we saw the venue we all shouted for joy, me especially because this is my last chance to snag my Zaddy.
Honestly, the venue was the most beautiful tent like thing I’ve seen. It was simply breathtaking. Following the ushers, we got situated on a table extremely far from my mother. Although the table was occupied by two couples I was still down to party. This reception seh! I must parrttaayyy!! As soon as we were seated, a waiter came to get our orders. As much as I wanted to eat the pounded yam, I opted for rice so that they will not think I am a foodie. I can show my true FFO status later.
Settling down, we ate and enjoyed the program. As I saw the couple take their first dance, I just went ‘awwwwwwwwwwwwww’ me sef I go love ooo. Honestly, I was so hyped you would think I was the one marrying. How can I not show off when both the bride and her sisters are simply beautiful and I get to call them cousin #sheds tears of Joy.
After all the serenre and the band playing for the “oldies”for a while, I and Ife went to see my mum. After assuring her we would go home in time we went back to our seats. The DJ soon started playing Jams and people were moving on their seats. At this point I and Ife decided to leave the venue at 7:30/8:00pm so as to get home in time. At just about 7:30 though the bride and groom made their grand entrance to fireworks and DJ hits. Everyone stood up for the newest couple in town, it was awesome.
To the After Party
After the grand entrance, everybody was up on their feet and dancing. The lights were dimmed, more food was going around (dessert), strobe lights were on and the DJ was giving hits back to back. At this point I was so caught up in all the fun that only 1/4 of my mind was on the fact that I was still waiting for my Sugar daddy. Going to the bar I tried to get baileys, but couldn’t. I ended up getting red wine for me and Ife. As we were working on the bottle, desserts started coming.
First I had a slice of red velvet cake with whipped cream and a cherry on top .Then I had another slice of chocolate cake and a cocktail.Then I shared out of Ife’s waffle and ice cream.
As the DJ dropped some “sakamanje” I and Ife were up and dancing. Lemme confess now, as I was dancing I was still scouting, ‘where art thou oh my sugar daddy?’Meanwhile there was this fine specimen of manhood on the next table beside me. As me I was eyeing him, he turned towards me. Yesss!!!!! Finally I found the one.The one that broke my heart was when he turned to look at Ife and smiled at her.Lobatan!!! Who did I offend in this life bayii ooo?!!! Tummy filled with sweets, happy from the red wine, I and Ife gave them moves back to back. The ZANKU I don’t even know how to dance, I sha danced it there.
The DJ now decided to kill it and played Askamaya –Teni .Immediately I lost all my home training in that place.
It was almost 9pm when I realized that my phone was dead and we needed to calla taxify to go home. Thank God for carrying charger up and down. We went looking for a place to charge and thankfully found the manager’s office. I plugged my phone and we went back to party.
After Ife’s mum called her nothing less than 5 times we picked up my phone and went to wait for our ride. In my mind I was shedding tears because the party was just getting interesting nau. Sebi if I had a sugar daddy now, he would have bought me a car. Las las we got home okay after having so much fun. But I still didn’t get a Sugar Daddy.
Girls, tell me…. is there anything special I need to do??Because omo I really need to find a Zaddy ooo sharp sharp.
Hope you enjoyed the series? Show some love and drop a comment. I love y’all for staying with me through this. Xoxo rubies