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Single in 9ja: the F code to why you are still single

     
Imagine my 15 year old cousin making fun of the fact that i am still a single pringle. Yes o!If you follow me on IG and have me on whatsapp you have probably seen this on my status/story. I will keep saying it though because it touched the bottom of my junk-food filled belly. If you happen to be single like me and have friends that any little thing its ‘lovey-dovey’ time , you kow how pained i am.
          Last week i went with my aunt @kemisolamoradeyo who is a relationship counselor to an event.On the way back in the taxify cab we started up a conversation about Davido and Chioma (i will just skip that part because if i start to talk ehn…)
      Anyways , we (i, my aunt and the taxify driver) began to discuss relationships and what men want from a lady. (maybe i’ll do a blog post on that from my aunts point of view). Now this talk was long and it moved from one topic to another. The driver supported the fact that my aunt said that no man right now wants a lady who does not have a job or a business of interest. He went further to give an example of a lady who he was dating  that spends 2 days learning tailoring and the rest partying.  A 29 year old lady who will travel from Illorin to Lagos to party. – picture me with my mouth open here because it just sounded like a Nollywood movie script.
        That aside , we then began to discuss ladies and guys who are single and yet are good-looking and well set up with a job/business. That was the conversation that inspired this post.
        If youre younger and you feel like this post is for the older ones,think again and if you are older and think this post is for the younger ones,you got it all wrong.
Serving it to you straight here is the F code to why you (we) are still single
  • You’re not putting your best foot foward

      Our generation is the ‘Slay Age’ as my aunt calls it and its a really apt description. I mean, there are times i see a 13 year old on instagram and i know that on IG she simply blows me out if the water. So tell me why when there are younger teens with the best dress sense ever , you now decide to use the most blurry unflattering picture ever as your dp. In as much as i am 10005% on this table that i am shaking and a devout supporter of the “lazy’ type of style, make sure your lazy is chic too. Starting this brand ‘Lazytrendychic’ is as much for my benefit as it is for yours, this blog has motivated me to dress better and make an effort (still lazy but well #shrug emoji).
        The fact is dressing lazy is not bad as long as it is lazy and chic. One thing my aunt said stuck with me. She said if she takes her kid son to the mall to pick a toy, he is automatically drawn to the shiny, prettily packaged toys first. This she related to both men and ladies. No matter how non-materialistic you are you still are drawn to appearances . So if you are drawn to fine nicely dressed guys , how come you ignore the fact that this applies to you too.
Dress up to feed your ego darlings. Do it for you!
  •          Ditch your ‘Dream Man’ fixation

     Eyyyyy! before you all come for me , i am not saying you lower your standards! For no reason at all should you lower your standards. Now lets be honest here, we all know that our dream men posess qualities that are just simply outrageous/ridiculous. I mean you find a fine bobo , 6’2 tall, good behaviour and just because your dream man has six packs and he doesn’t you say no. Pssst! take it from me, your villagers are at work. Hopefully las las its not a midget aunty will marry.
     On a more serious note though, we all need to re-evaluate and formulate more realistic expectations. Remember that at the end of the day, all you need is someone that makes you genuinely happy.
  • Break Free of your past

    There is a catch phrase coined by my continuously mentioned aunt that just explains this point for me .
“Shenk the Sheges”
        Dear darling girl or guy, you are out of that relationship for a reason. You cannot keep carrying a torch for your ex. In case you were not aware,everyone gives off a vibe subconsiously. No matter how much you want to get back into the game, without leaving the past behind you will keep giving off an unapproachable vibe to people interested in you.
your ex , in  this case is the ‘shege’. You need to Shenk – ditch the Shege– bad luggage.
    Plus , we all should be careful what kind of vibe we give off and we should also be doubly careful to not completely judge by the vibe a person gives off. It may all be in your head, so you gotta try to know for sure, Shikena.
  • You just don’t give a f#ck

        Pardon the obscene word  but honestly , those on this table just know themselves. If you fall into this category just smile to yourself. All i can say is Do your make up… or not ,dress up, go out and make the cash while having fun. When its the right time , the right guy will find you.  Remember this tips for later.
       Do not forget to like and comment guys. Plus share to every one you know and those you don’t. You can also follow me on IG @ireprubies and turn on post notifications to know when there is a new blog post. I try to post at  least once a week but ideally twice (Tuesday and Saturday).
 signing out, XOXO.
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corporate events Fashion other style

My Special Formula for Getting Dressed In 5 Minutes

get dressed in five minutes

 

How much time do you spend while dressing up? Luckily for me I concocted a special formula for getting dressed that takes five minutes so I can get some extra snooze time. Most of my friends spend so much time on dressing up while I catch some extra shut eye. Don’t get me wrong I can fall into this category too, sometimes I try on every outfit before deciding on the one I wore first. But because being short on time is a staple in my life (I like sleep too much) I had to become the fastest dresser. Without make up (I cannot do makeup) it takes me a maximum of 5 minutes to get dressed, and considering this is nothing short of a miracle for some I decided to share the deets.

the truth about friends and an ootd

CHOOSE YOUR OUTFIT

The first step is to decide what outfit you are in the mood for. This step would ideally be done the day before, but because I know myself and I know my people this should be done as soon as you are up. If you are like me and you like to stretch, while stretching pull up a visual of your wardrobe and mentally assemble your outfit. If you are not the stretching type, you can mentally prepare while in the shower. This will drastically eliminate the time you waste by standing in front of your closet and staring (Yes I know you do it).

Be sure to consider where you are going to pick comfortable and suitable clothes.

  • Make sure to stick to the basics. Remember you do not have enough time to pull off a complicated outfit. Basic color schemes and clothing items are best.
  • Having a WELL ORDERED WARDROBE does wonders for you throughout your “dressing like flash” process.

 

PICK OUT AND WEAR YOUR CLOTHES

After deciding what to wear, go to your wardrobe and see what you have to work with. If you have decided on what to wear- skirt and shirt/jeans and top/denim- pick out one of each and wear. Remember to stick to basic colors as it would help reduce the time spent on looking for matching bag, shoes and accessories.

NOTE: DO NOT STRAY FROM WHAT YOU HAVE DECIDED ON.

I know you could look into your wardrobe and a lovely dress would catch your eye after deciding on Denim. If you decide to switch, you would end up trying it on and then ditching it when you remember why you picked denim. OOPS!!! Suddenly you’ve spent 3 minutes trying and discarding a dress. Stick to the goal of getting dressed in 5 minutes.

At this point you probably have only about 2-3 minutes left and it’s time to turn a basic outfit into something stylish.

Just Like in food; Clothes are the basic Ingredients, Accessories are the Sauce. Click To Tweet

ADD A POP OF COLOUR

dressed

If you stuck to a basic color palette, then you might want to add a pop of color. You can add an extra clothing item like a jacket, scarf, beanie, beret while getting dressed. Now do not overdo it. Remember you are still going to accessorize and you do not want to end up looking like Christmas puked all over you. This is also where you can layer in style in case the weather is cold or its winter.

ACCESORIZE

dressed

I personally love this part because once I’m getting dressed, I immediately know what accessories to wear to downplay or spice up the outfit. Ideally though,stick with simple and chic accessories that take your outfit to Classy. Here are a few tips on accessories

  • Use a chain with tops that bare your neck

dressed

  • Big earrings make your outfit more chic

dressed

earrings from @anusignature

  • Small earrings scream understated, classy and professional

dressed

earrings from @jewelry_ave

  • Wear a watch
  • Bangles can take an outfit from plain old to fun and sassy.

STICK TO NEUTRAL COLOURED BAG AND SHOE

So you are basically dressed, and so as not to start another debate just stick to those shoes and bag that go with everything. The ones in basic colors like black or nude or brown. It will not leave you looking too plain because you have accessorized and you also won’t look like you are overdoing it.

Having given you the secret formula, here are a few most easily put together outfit for different occasions

   WHAT TO WEAR FOR DIFFERENT OCCASIONS

For Work

Pant trousers and a shirt

Accessories: Stud Earrings, wristwatch and heels or flats

For school

-Casual

Jeans and a top with sneakers/ballet flats

Accessories: Big earrings, wristwatch plus bangles

-Formal

Shirt and a Skirt plus ballet flats

Accessories: Big earrings, wristwatch and bracelet

For a women’s function

Skirt, chiffon top and heels

Accessories: Stud earrings, wristwatch and bangles (if you want)

For a Casual Outing

Denim on denim with a camisole plus sneakers/ballet flats

Accessories: Big earrings

dressed

photo credit for the flatlays: ME @ireprubies

 For a date

A Knee length dress (sundress/bodycon) with heels or ballet flats

Accessories: Big earrings, chain, wristwatch and a bracelet

 

You will spend a lot of time getting dressed at times. That is okay, because after all “Slaying is serious business”. Has my secret formula been helpful? Like the post and drop a comment if it has.

 

QUICK QUESTION

Do you think if I finally learn make up you would want to learn with me?? And how about a 10 minute max. Make up look?? Drop a comment and let me know what you think.

 

XOXO Rubies.

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Fashion

BOY BYE: 3 Awesome ways to style Statement Tee

statement tee

I have always had something for statement tee , the more awesome the quote the better. Pairing up a statement tee to look awesome is lots simpler than most think. Here I’ll be showing off my favorite statement tee of all time while showing you how to pair it up and sharing an experience I had some time ago with a guy that made me go ‘Boy Bye’.

Statement tee with Jeans (low waist or high waist) and sneakers

statement tee

This is one of the easiest ways to style a statement tee, especially if you are in a rush or want to look really casual.  Simply pick a denim jean and a pair of sneakers and you are good to go.

statement tee

Outfit details: Statement tee and jeans from @dkhayempire

Shoes : A lucky buy at Sabo market,Sagamu.

photocredit: @babatolaphotography

So to the story I promised y’all.I went out on a date with a friend as a favor. Luckily, her date also came with someone else so it was not awkward and we had a fun time. I thought that I and Mr. X hit it off and that was confirmed when at the end of the night he asked for my number which I gave him. It was a good end to an outing I really was not sure of at first.

Statement tee and a skirt

statement tee

Pair a statement tee with either a pencil or pleated skirt to give a girly look. You can either dress this outfit up with heels or down with sneakers or sandals.

statement tee
too much of a goofball

Tassel earrings by @jewelry_ave

statement tee

I rarely wear skirts so when I eventually do I like pairing them with statement tees to give it a bit of sass.

Back to Mr.X, after a few days we began to chat on whatsapp with a few calls here and there in between. We both went out a few times with my friend and her date. Throughout all these I felt like we vibed and he would be a great friend. Turns out I judged too quickly.

Statement tee with pant trousers and ballet flats (Sassy corporate outfit)

statement tee

My first love outfit. Every time I have to go to school (we have a compulsory corporate dress code for school) I simply throw this on with or without a suit jacket. Dressing up for school can be a hassle but I have it down to a science now (a blog post on that coming soon) and this helps a lot.

Mr.X turned out to be an asshole pretty soon enough. I and my friend went to pay them a visit at home on a sunny afternoon and while talking, he began to go sexual. He was basically operating on the assumption that I would sleep over and engage in sexual activities with him. Now there would have been nothing wrong if he would just take my emphatic ‘NO’ and move on. Instead he decide to behave like a petulant child and became nasty. He even went as far as to write me a whatsapp message basically saying “fuck off’. Good riddance I Said … Boy Bye!!!!!

statement tee

I was brought up to respect myself and have high self-esteem, so I would definitely not take any of that from a man no matter who he is. Ladies, remember when a guy begins to feel too important tell him to use the door and not let it hit him on his way out. We are queens and whoever is the one for you will definitely respect you. Thus ended the tale of Mr.X.

I hope you enjoyed this post, don’t forget to catch up with me on social media and leave a comment.

Also a blog post on my gym escapedes coming up on thursday people. #woop woop

Lots of love from here. Xoxo.

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